To answer or not to answer?
December 30th, 2007
I’ve read several articles about how to answer to the commentators. And, in fact, I don’t even need to read them, because it’s common sense to give polite answers and not to offend your commentators. Until now this wasn’t a problem for me. But what do you do when there are comments that pissed you off?
Four days ago someone leaves me a comment on my post, Great Top 13 lists. For those of you who don’t know, it’s a collection of Top 13 lists, many of them with valuable information, many of them funny. I’ve choose 13, according to my blog’s theme. And the Joe’s comment was:
Your lists are ridiculous - whoever heard of a top 13? It is supposed to be top 10. I am a statistics major, so I know about these things and I am writing a book about top 10 lists too, so you see I know better than you. I am embarrassed for you.
And here was my answer:
Just because you write a book about top 10 lists it doesn’t mean that 10 are establishing by law. “whoever heard of a top 13?? Well, it seems that there are many people who heard about top 13 lists, who write top 13 lists and who likes top 13 lists. And that number could be whatever an author would be. You should check how many “top 17? lists there are, “top 26? or you can pick whatever number you want.
As a statistics major, you probably know more than me. But you can’t ignore the facts that 10 isn’t the only number for a top. And you can’t annul a top list, just because the number isn’t 10.
And when you say that you are embarrassed for me, it means that you are embarrassed for all these people who wrote these top 13 lists. Shame on them that they don’t wrote top 10 lists, so that you have what to write in your book
Oh, and happy holidays for you, too
Of course that statistically speaking, there are much many Top 10 lists than any other Top n lists. But really, if I want to make a Top 13.5 of something, I’ll make that list and I don’t care that Top 10 lists are more popular. And I don’t feel ashamed about my list. In fact, I think that more important than the number is the content.
Well, I’m asking you: what did you do if someone leaves a negative comment on your blog? Do you delete that comment? Do you leave it and ignore it? Do you give him a polite answer? Or do you give an edgy answer?
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Entry Filed under: Blogging
I think you made a big mistake by posting a reply like that.
What i mean ? You should been more harsh, and now how does him being a statistics major have anything to do with going out and talking crap at asymmetrical lists. Infact if he really knew his numbers he should’ve known that the real reason for asymmetrical lists is to grab and hold people’s attention of an otherwise sic stat.
And i still think you should’ve been a lot more harsh on him, but i guess you did the right thing by not letting him bother you. And personally i think the 13 theme is real good, i’m pretty new on the blogosphere and yours is the only blog i read with a theme like this. And its pretty good actually ..
Cheers ..
Guru’s last blog post..So Close To Joining The Sponsored Posts Bandwagon
It’s your list do as you please..as far as commentary..if it’s critical but constructive..I’ll answer…if it’s just another childish remark by the numerous pompous asses out there I will ignore it..if they are persistant I’ll just trash it…Happy New Year..
robert bourne’s last blog post..Monday-Monday
Should have just said, because 13 is the theme of this site followed by a bolded ‘duuuuh’. If the comment is racist/sexist/religious/political(and not relevant), I don’t even approve those posts as spam. That particular comment I might have just left a little jibe pointing to the 13 theme until he/she got the hint.
Sometimes a little controversy is a good thing to stir up readers, and bring them in to comment. Makes your blog like a community of sorts.
Mitch at Money News’s last blog post..The SEO Song, Yea I Was REALLY Bored
Aww, that’s must have been a shocking experience.. So sorry to hear..
Once, I have an email from a guy came outta no where.., he was simply comment to my blog and my design style in some negative way. I think he didn’t want everyone read what he wrote in the blog commenting page, that is why he sent me email..sound bitter, sarcastic and unconstructive appreciation..he didn’t show me clearly on which of my designs needed some improvement..
I choose to ignore, because I feel it was pointless..It would be different if he shouted his crititism in a polite manner..I would thanking him and appriciate as a precious feedback instead..
Your reply to Joe is reasonable enough..you’ll get used to deal with this kind of comment
A u d e e’s last blog post..DotArt Paintings
@Guru: Well, I must say that when I’ve read your first phrase, my heard stop to beat for a second
Thanks for your kind words. Initially, my answer was a little harsher. But then, I’ve edited it, because I’ve learned that even if I’m really pissed of, a too much harsh answer could eventually make more harm then good. We have a word: “always leave a place for a Hello”.
@robert: Thanks for your comment and advice. I think I’ll do the same and next time I’ll not be chewed-up anymore
@Mitch: That’s why I’ve decided to post about this comment, to find out what my community are thinking
Your advices are very valuable to me, since I’m still a newbie and I’m still learning about all this stuff.
@Audee: It wasn’t pleasant, indeed. I appreciate the constructive criticism too and I’m really happy when someone takes the time to give me such kind of criticism, even if it’s in a harsh manner.
I think making a “top 13″ actually wins you points for being original. Everyone makes top 10s, so top 13s are a niche. Good go Diana!
Oh and I believe anyone that replies with that much bitternes and with stuff like “I am embarrassed for you” can’t get too far. Everyone knows a succesful business is done by scratching everyone else’s back a little, so what did he have to win by sticking a knife in yours?
Thanks Tudi!
He didn’t win anything, he just spread some unkindness on my post
“A soft answer turns away wrath.”
No need to be harsh. It will only show how childish you will be.
Explaining just as you did is just ok. Yeah, what if it’s top 11? or top 9? who cares? Actually, 13 is even relative to famous numbers us being unlucky…but what you do in part erases that to oblivion and makes 13 more pleasant. I’m not against 13 at all and I’m not superstitious.
I pity such people….actually I’ve been a victim myself of some unkind remarks from one commenter to another. It’s more like there is this particular blog I used to go to and was able to be part of a small community that made the blog alive. Just a few of us…9 including the blogger. Then time passed by like about 10 months…a new set of visitors roamed around and joined the community. Then a contest was held by the blogger…a logo and slogan contest. Some asked for extension. I said the rules must stay…without the idea that there were just a few who joined..like 8 entries only. I insisted on principle. But if there must be a change, ask other entrants. If there was only myself, by all means, extend. Heated eyes were against me saying I just wanted to win the prize money. And that one of my entries were copied from somewhere (showed the link) but to my clean conscience not an idea was copied from anywhere. I hate copying. I like to be unique, spontaneous and original. Anyway, I withdrew my entries. It turned out that the blogger fell in love with my entry the first time he saw it…but then I withdrew already. I would not go for the 10,000-PHP prize if some jerks will just ruin my name. I ended up staying away from the blog. I go there from time to time, very rarely now, but lost interest, really.
It was a blessing in disguise as I was able to roam around and spot your blog as a result.
Thank you all for your comments and for your support. I really appreciate
Audee and c5, I’m sorry that you have similar experiences. It’s a very unpleasant feeling when you read such unkindness comments/feedback (and that just to be kind
). It’s just me or what? I have the feeling that women are more affected than men by such comments/unkindness words?
You go girl! Some folks don’t like change or anything that goes against boring, standard tradition. I like your Lucky 13. It makes you stand out, and I always remember because it’s different. You’re on the right track.
Melissa Donovan’s last blog post..2007 Milestones and Top 5 Posts
Thanks Melissa! Not only they don’t like changes, but they even compel to other people their rules. When someone tells me that “it suppose to be 10″, well, I see something red in front of my eyes. Or black?
For me, if the reply is bearable by my other reader than I approve it and reply to it according to the comment content…If not, just unapproved it…simple…how to reply such harsh comment…you are on the right track..
nimrodjo’s last blog post..Year End Tag-Best Memories Of 2007
Diana, the Internet is full of “101 Things to Do…”, “50 Best Plugins”, “64 Questions…” and other articles, mentioning numerical value much greater, than 13. A lot of people read and follow it, and some of those posts belong to “legend” bloggers or major papers. The guy should post his comments there.
You are good in delivering great content. Don’t even think about that comment.